You might have heard that a principal of a Florida school is out of a job after sixth-grade students were shown (exposed to?) an image of Michelangelo’s statue of David in a Renaissance art class.
Some parents complained they hadn’t been notified that an image of the statue would be shown in the classroom. They hadn’t realized their children would be subject to “pornography.” Because if you look closely you’ll notice David is naked, and right there for everyone to see are his genitals!
This kind of deviance is no longer tolerated in Florida schools. Exit the school principal, who is no longer employed, and many thanks to Florida officials that the children are now safe, if not from guns and school shootings, then at least from art.
I wonder how I’m not more screwed up than I am. In Buffalo’s Delaware Park, right near where I grew up, there is a replica of Michelangelo’s David. I must have passed that statue hundreds of times. I’ve climbed on its base and taken photographs. My father drove by that statue along the Scajacuada Expressway twice a day on his work commute for twenty-five years.
I don’t remember my parents being offended by that statue or demanding it be taken down. I don’t remember my parents complaining to local officials or my mother saying, “David, cover your eyes!” when we drove past it on our way to Niagara Falls. I do remember liking that I shared a name with this guy in the statue. I mean, he had a great body—literally sculpted. Good hair too. And he was a hero—a biblical hero!—for taking down the Philistine giant Goliath in one-on-one combat.
Little did I know then that I was being groomed by pornographic iconography. No wonder I’ve turned out the way I have. Hopefully, with Florida Governor and Supreme Commander of the Culture Wars Ron DeSantis at the helm, other innocent children might be saved from such a terrible fate as mine.
